Heaven

As humans, we seem to have an innate problem with death. We go so far as to create creatures that don't die in fairy tales such as vampires and zombies. Why is that? It's the case with us Christians too.

A huge part of it is, I don't think we were made to die in the first place. We are eternal beings.

As Christians this shouldn't frighten us, because even once we die, we go home. Our real home. There, our wrinkles, pimples, frown lines, and tears all fall away. There we see long lost relatives.
What is more, our continuous search to fill the empty spaces, spaces I believe won't be filled until we reach heaven, will be whole. Our wounds won't just be stitched up but will be gone forever lost.
What is more, we will be in the ever-going presence of our God. However the relationship holds with each person, that relationship which was broken like everything else in our short lives, will be healed without even a mark of a scar. There we can dance, sing, laugh, play, and be without the worries and bindings of tomorrow. So we should rejoice for our friends and loved ones that go home.

Still, it's hard, isn't it? Those loved ones we won't hear laugh again. We won't exchange stories with them again, get mad at them, irritated, feel joyous with them again, get hugs from them. Whether they are silent or boisterous they are a presence that once they are gone will go away.
That, at least for me, is the hardest part.

Crazy World

Since the last time I wrote on here, a few things have transpired. The one that makes me the proudest was a whole week where I wrote. I didn’t go back through the old stuff and try to rewrite, I just wrote! It was wonderful and invigorating. I think I’ll be done with my first draft fairly soon and that will be a first for me. I have this nasty habit of going over my old writing before I am finished with the first draft, cringe, and scrap the whole thing before starting over. Not productive.

            Fairly soon after my writing frenzy, I received a temp job. They may or may not hire me full time. Either way, I’m on the work force again! Isn’t that awesome! I think it is. Ask me the same later, but for now I’m ecstatic.

            It is lovely to know that God is still on my side.

            It’s a crazy world and I’ll never know what happens from one time to the next. J

Thoughts on the last seven months

What have I been doing since the last time I wrote to you. It's been, what, seven months now? I've been figuring life and me out. Life on the ship was so amazing that when I got back to dry ground for good, I had a hard time dealing.  I had to re-acknowledge that to God I am beautiful, I am amazing, and isn't the world beautiful?
Seriously look around yourself. If it is snowing, every snow flake is different. It creates a softening of the world, makes it seem ublemmished. If it's raining then the sound makes a noise that relaxes one, brings up memories, and gives a sense of safety. Night has stars and moon with everything going to sleep minus the cayotees right outside my window who howl and wail and make me feel all snug in my safe house. Day has a brightness that goads me on to do things. There's the bustle, lively chapter and all the beautiful colors.
Then there are the people. Oh how amazing people are. There are so many cultures in this world and then if you subculture them then it spreads wider. How often have I been surprised by people. It happens so often and it always brings a happy smile on my face. How crazy is it just have a small conversation with the person standing near you, and how amazingly interesting those conversations can be.
I've learned specific things about myself too. Things that make me burst with joy. Four years ago I would barely ever leave the house because I didn't have a clue how to make friends outside of work or church. Now I have friends I can ask to do something and they willingly agree. People like me! It's not just pity friendship. How wonderful is that?
I never stop learning and I never want to.

God bless you all.
Heather

A tv show that I surprisingly liked

Something that has perked my interest in my new breeze in watching way more tv than I should, is the tv show How to Look Good Naked and not because I think having newd pictures of women is a good thing but because of what they try to do.
Women are notorious when it comes to their self esteem about their bodies. You go up to any woman you know and ask her what she doesn't like about her body and most of the time she will give you a list of body parts. She'll have a very hard time saying what she likes about her body. This show tries to bring a woman's self esteem about her own body, the body God gave her and is proud of, up a notch. That is amazing.
Many years ago, I had a horrible self esteem about my personality. I've mentioned it in other blogs so I won't go into it, but since then I have felt a heart for all those women lied at by Satan. I don't just feel sad for them. It makes me literally angry at the being that did this to them. God made every woman beautiful. They just need to know that to let that beauty shine. God does not make crappy work. So this show was pretty amazing in my mind. 
:)

My Three Things of Interest

Because I am currently minus a job, I have had time to explore the many deep reaches of the internet and gaming world. That's right, I'm a nerd, but not quite a gaming nerd. I don't game that much.

This gives me three things to tell you about.

My first thing is, of course, a nerdy thing: Skyrim. It is made by the same creators of the Fallout series (another favorite of mine) and Oblivion, so basically it is a game where you explore, make decisions which effects your character's morals, go on quests, and basically get killed a million times if you are me. Still, though I have to save often, it is fun, because I like the freedom to do what I want when I want. There is not linear progression which is mandatory and I can choose to upgrade where I want. For instance I could be an amazing blacksmith but a horrible swords smith. Right now, I'm a mage class human who is also good with the sword and bow and arrow. The one bad thing about that is I don't grow strong in just magical powers or just swordplay. It makes the progress in one's growth as a magician fairly slow, but it's worth it cause I have magical armor that protects me from both the sword and spells, and I can defeat things that I wouldn't have otherwise.

My point to you is, if you are a person who loves games where you can just wander and build up the character, than this is the game for you.

The next thing, or I should say person, which/who has caught my attention is Felicia Day. She has become quite the hero to the nerd world; after all she is smart, beautiful, and games. See! We are cool too. On youtube I am now subscribed to two of her programs: Geek and Sundry, and Felicia Day.

Here are the sights:

http://www.youtube.com/user/feliciaday

http://www.youtube.com/user/geekandsundry

Lastly is my short term fascination with a church in Kansas. I'm not going to say their name, because I don't have anything good to say about them. I was just so awestruck at how much hatred they showed that I couldn't stop researching them. Not once in the full amount of time that I looked them up did I see anything loving about them. They are a church? Isn't that what they are supposed to preach? I kind of felt sorry for the children of the church because of the brain washing and the constant preaching they were being inundated with.

Thankfully my cousin stepped in and reminded me that I was doing exactly the same thing as them: judging. I don't want to be that person. So, my obsession is over, and I learned an important lesson: don't worry about what other people are doing wrong (especially if I can't do anything about them), but about myself, and how I can better myself in the Kingdom that is God's.

Well thank you for reading my blog

Sincerely,

Me

A New Twist on this Blog

So far I have just been writing mini-sermons (my way of saving the world from having to actually having to listen to my ranting and raving) but I think I want to write my actual thoughts; what I've been thinking during the week, or that day.

So, my very next blog post should be on the things I've been focused on lately.

Enjoy

love

The God who made all this loves you with a passionate, stubborn love.